Would You Do It Again?

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Last week, I couldn’t bring myself to write the usual Mother’s Day devotional. I couldn’t find the uplifting pretty words to talk about the most difficult job in the world. While it is wonderful to honor mothers once a year, I can’t help but think about the mothers who are hurting because of their children. When our children are born we watch them struggle as they learn to talk, walk, and run. We watch them struggle with separation anxiety as they go to school for the first time. In new surroundings, they have their feelings hurt and their knees skinned. As they grow, they experience the pain of the first break up and they realize there are people who don’t like them.

Some mothers are hurting because they lose their unborn babies and they spend a lifetime mourning that loss. Every day young moms lose their children as babies before they have a chance to know them. The loss of a child can be experienced when the young man or woman walks away from their family and decides to walk the path of the prodigal. Accidents, illness, drugs, and war take countless children from us. 

So, I have to ask you a week after Mother’s Day, would you do it again? Knowing about the hurt, the pain, the loss, the tests that come with mothering would you do it again?

I wonder how Jesus’ mother, Mary, would answer that question. She was given the ultimate responsibility of carrying and caring for the Son of God. She watched Him grow as a child. How did she feel when he skinned His knees and bled down to His toes. Did she panic when He lagged behind at the Temple and they couldn’t find Him? When He neglected nutrition and rest to serve in ministry did she question the call on His life? When He chose to spend time with twelve men instead of His family, did she feel neglected and abandoned? What went through her mind when the persecution started and He was arrested and nailed to the cross? Did she lose her breath when she saw with her own eyes her beloved son hanging on the cross agonizing and writhing in pain?

So Mary, would you do it again? Without hesitating, I think she would say yes!

In Luke 1:46-53, Mary rejoiced at the prospect of carrying God’s Son. For most women, motherhood is a time to rejoice. Carrying a child and giving birth is an honor.

In Luke 2:33-35, When Jesus was dedicated at the Temple, His mother and father were amazed at the things being said about their son. But Mary was also warned about the pain this Son would bring to her heart, “and a sword will pierce even your own soul-to the end that thoughts from many hearts be revealed.”  It doesn’t take long to find out that our children experience pain in this life and that breaks our hearts.

Mary had the joy and privilege of carrying God’s Son but she also had the duty to bear the pain of His loss. I think if we asked her personally, “would you do it again?” She would jump at the chance to reassure each one of us as mothers. She can reassure us because now her perspective is an eternal perspective. I like to imagine that she might look each one of us in the eye and say, “it is hard being a mother but…like my Son, Jesus, each child is born with a purpose and a plan for his/her life. It hurts to watch them struggle with the hardest parts of life. But even in the pain, there is purpose.”

What in your child’s life has caused you pain? If you knew what you know now, would you become a mother again?

Heavenly Father, Touch the hurting hearts of mothers today. Please give us a glimpse or even an eye full of your eternal perspective. It’s an honor to serve you by serving our children. In Jesus Name, Amen

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About cindymmolder

I found out this "About" section is the place where I tell a "little" about me and "a lot" about the blog! Writing is therapy for me. It takes the pensees(French for thought) from my mind and gets them in print. For some reason, seemingly ordinary things form lessons in my mind. So basically, this blog consists of simple thoughts molded into life lessons. Maybe my last name is Molder because I am a Molder of Pensees. I am open to your stories and lessons also. Send them to me and you might be featured in a future blog!

12 responses »

  1. Very thought provoking Cindy. Sometimes while in the pain we wonder if we can bear it. Thanks for sharing and giving us cause to think.

  2. I would do it all over again in a heart beat…It was so wonderful to be able to raise my children and the most rewarding to be a stay at home mom most of the time..I have learned so many life lessons and through out their lives,up and downs, downs and ups came so much spiritual growth for me. I learned early on,God answers prayers, not always what I want but what He thinks is best…Marys pain,I can’t imagine….Pain of losing a young son-in-law 3 years ago, brought me closer to the Lord then anytime in my life…Pain, permits us to grow and our choice is to constantly strive to read His Word and make sense of all that He permits to happen…I thought of Mary many times and it was always a comfort to realize that others have known your pain and they are examples and leaders in the Bible to read about. I also know there is so much comforting we,can do when we as mothers reach out to other mothers to help them and meet them right where they are in life.

  3. Cindy,
    Always good to bring wonderful thoughts to mind. YES YES AND OH SO YES…..motherhood was something I waited, wondered and desired all my life. so when things in my life didn’t quite come in the order I had imagined, I took it upon myself to become a mother by adoption. And then when single motherhood became a challenge of my faith, I knew that God would provide the way. And I opened the door one more time and adopted a new brother for our family. And if I had to do it all over again I would jump as high and as fast as I did then. The blessings that have come to me because of motherhood are without a label. Thanks God for placing me in the hearts of my birth mothers.

    • Jean thanks so much for your heartfelt words. I know your boys and I know what kind of incredible mom you are, you are a great example to all of us. I have been encouraged by all the comments on the blog.

  4. Cindy, I’m pretty slow on the uptake but finally got around to commenting. Love the perspective on this, thank you so much for writing it! With my oldest son graduating a couple of weeks ago, it has been a time of introspection for me. I was reminded of a time when I had to make a tough decision to give that boy to God.
    When I was a teenager, and a new Christian, I saw a lady at the altar. She was crying like no one I had ever seen before. I asked a friend what was wrong with her, she told me that she was praying for her grown child who was not living for the Lord. I thought “I never want to feel like that!” I had lived my whole life up to that point without God, and knew the difference between my life with and without Him. I actually prayed on the spot, that I would rather not have children than ever know the feeling of having one lost for eternity.
    Fast forward 23 years, I’m in the hospital with a very sick newborn. The hospital we were at would not allow my husband to stay the night, so I was all alone with a baby in the nursery that I couldn’t touch. Tests were coming back with worse news every hour, then God reminded me of my young prayer. I felt him ask me if I still felt the same, now that I had held him in my arms. This precious little guy that I fell in love with at first sight, would it be better for God to take him now, or let him grow up and walk away from a peaceful eternity? I prayed the hardest prayer I have ever prayed, and let him go.
    The next blood test was at midnight. Even though I had been sedated, the nurses didn’t bother telling me to go back to bed. I just stood at their desk waiting for the results. It was then that we got the first positive reading all week. From there, he got better with every reading and we were both home in a matter of days.
    My husband and I could barely stand it, while we were going through the ordeal, but now I am glad it happened. We have gone back to this event and found peace that God knows what He is doing. We prayed the same prayer over our younger son. We went through one miscarriage, and I’m certain that that child is better off, and I will hold him or her in heaven. There is more at stake than what we can see with our eyes. We can’t control every situation. The older they get; we aren’t any less worried for them, but God can be everywhere, and He can do better than we can.
    Something my doctor told me when I was in the depths of despair in that hospital bed; “You can’t have a testimony without the test first.” This has been a great story to share with the boys over the years. I can’t tell it without crying, but they know they are marked. They still have a choice, but I believe that my God, who can see the future, knows what that choice is and will be. That is all the peace I need, so yes I would do it all over again.

    • Dear Terri,
      As tears drip off my chin, I am so amazed by your words. You touched my heart. Your honesty and transparency have inspired me to stay the course with one of my grown sons. I lay him before the Lord hourly. Also, you have encouraged me to keep writing. This blog post on Motherhood has received so many responses. I hope everyone will take time to read your comment. What an honor to have a small part in your life. With Love, cindy molder

      • Isn’t that what church is about? Holding each other up and reminding us of how God has always been faithful. One thing I know when praying for the soul of another, it is the only prayer in which you can be certain of God’s will. Grab that power and stand on it. Nothing is as strong as the prayer of a mother. I’m joining you now in that prayer. Love you back, thanks for your words of encouragment. It is hard to connect with people in such a large church, but you have always been someone that stands out as a sincere person. -Terri

  5. The greatest joys and the deepest hurts in my life have come from being a mother. The joys would not have been quite as sweet if the hurts were not quite as deep. The more of life I experience, the deeper the feelings I have as a mother. Some of them are sweeter than others. Though I am on my knees for them often, I would do it all again. It is what has made me what I am. Thanks for this post.

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